Thursday, February 2, 2012

Easy to Put On, Hard to Take Off

158.2

That's a gain of 3 whole pounds in one week. 

It was effortless, if I do say so myself.  So super easy to put that hamburger and those onion rings in my mouth, to devour that deep dish pizza and antipasto salad, to choose to stuff myself full of popcorn and Reese's Pieces.  I don't mean to brag but seriously, it was just so painless to gain that weight back.

{Insert sarcastic eyeroll here}

I totally let emotional eating control my life last weekend, and subsequently my entire week suffered.  We are in the process of letting the bank foreclose on my Mom's house and in a few months, the home will be emptied and padlocked.  My sister has decided to move back to San Diego, my brother is moving in with his girlfriend, and yet again, my entire life is changing.  There will be no central place for me to go "home" to anymore.  The chances that my siblings and I will all be together in the same house is slim to none.  Not to mention the fact that we are tasked with going through all of the home's contents and either donating, selling, or trashing 26 years of stuff. 

I miss my Mom.  I miss her leadership.  I miss her friendship.  I miss her shoulder to cry on.  I hate that this is all happening and there's nothing that I can do to stop it.  I hate that my Dad's "Little Plot" is going away.  I hate that there will be no place for me to feel grounded in this transient military lifestyle anymore.  I hate that my siblings and I will be in totally different states.  I really, really hate change.

So, it was super easy for me to turn to stuffing my face to not deal with all of that. 

I will have to do better, though, in the coming months as we make several trips back and forth to clean things out.  I can't let my emotions control how I'm going to eat.  I'm going to have to plan better in advance and bring prepared dinners, and not give in to junk.

Back on the wagon this morning -- and holding on for dear life!

1 comment:

Susan, Ryan, Pete and Chester said...

Hugs! I frustration eat, so I kind of understand. I'll just be your cheerleader, you can do it!!!